Thursday, February 1, 2007

Evil Genius at Work

I have been reading on other blogs about the CIA (Cat Intelligence Agency). Unfortunately, I am not a member of this fine organization due to my affiliation with the FBI (Feline Brothers Initiative). The good news is that both organizations are working towards a common goal which is the domination of huskies. We in the FBI have targeted huskies because we know that if we domination huskies we will, in turn, dominate humans. This is our hierarchy of living creatures.

To prove my evil genius and why I have been chosen to be in the FBI, let me just tell you about one of my plots. Sometimes when Mom and Dave go to the movies or to work, and they leave the furry beasts in the cage, they are gone just a little too long and the furry beasts start to have trouble holding their bodily wastes. I am always on the lookout for when this is happening. That is when I spring into action. I secretly climb to the top of the cage and at just the right moment, I jump off of the cage and give them my best roar.
This always scares the crap (literally) out of them. Then they have to wait until Mom and Dave get home to see what they have done. It’s brilliant because it embarrasses them and then I get to watch Mom or Dave scrub down the cage. So really I’m humiliating both husky and human.

Eventually I know that I will no longer be scary to the beasts. So I’m working on phase 2 where I sneakily put their paws in warm water while they are sleeping. I just have to figure out how to transport the water without getting a single drop on me.



The Army of Four said...

Wilbur: First off, I love your white socks. Very attractive and rather athletic-looking. But you cats will NEVER dominate us Siberians. Your plan is rather short-sighted. When Steve and Kat no longer find you scary, it will mean they've grown up. And do you know what grown up huskies do when the bipeds are gone? ANYTHING they WANT to. That's right - no more being stuck in a box. Free-range Siberians. You'll be begging for the sanctity of one of those boxes for yourself. Trust me. (I'm a Siberian.)
Tail wags,
PS: I really DO like those socks!

Macie-Malechai said...

Don't think they won't remember this when they get a little bigger, boy will you ever be sorry! We haven't forgotten how the cats at our house tortured us (we're just waiting for the opportune moment, then whammy, no more kitties).
As our future president, Turbo would say, "Cats are STUPID!"

Steve, Kat, & Wilbur said...

Thanks for the compliment, Storm. Those socks are how I managed to get my evil little self rescued from the pound by my mom. She thought I was cute, but never dreamed I would become a lean, mean biting and scratching machine!


Deanna said...

Someday, a dog will belly-flop on you, and you will be sorry!

Khady Lynn said...

Listen to Cubby Wilbur. We are big, we have big teeth inside our big mouth's. Just think "squish" and there ya go. That's what happens to cats when we're around.

Did you humans fail to mention to you that Siberians (and us Malamutes too) are known cat killers? Hmmmmmm, I bet not.

Wonder why that is...........