News Flash! Evil Husky Revealed!

Hi, Wilbur here. During the day, when Mom and Dad are working and the furry beasts are in the crate, I like to relax, let down my fur, and surf the internet. Sometimes I hack into Mom's email to make sure she's not saying bad stuff about me.

Imagine my surprise, when yesterday I discovered this email:

Hello ,

Thank you for your order.

Order Receipt:

Date: Mon Mar 03 11:24:12 -0500 2008
Order Status: Accepted

Dyson DC15 Ball w/Animal Plus Kit 15

Factory Direct Int. Inc.
www.FactoryDirectSuperstore.com

What? A Dyson? I have read enough dog and cat blogs to know that I DO NOT want a Dyson living here. Even furry beasts hate Dysons. So imagine how even more surprised I was to find another email sent this weekend from one furry beast, Khyra. (Names not changed to protect the guilty.) In Khyra's email, she specifically directed my mom to the website where she ordered the Dyson.

How can Khyra claim to be so nice and love the furry beasts when she schemed to bring a Dyson into our home? She's supposed to be the boy furry beast's girlfriend! Although, our first clue should have been the fact that she has other boyfriends besides him.

Beware furry beasts! Khyra is nothing but trouble!

Meow,
Wilbur

Ulee versus the Bissel

Ulee is my hero. Kat and I went to day camp today and Ulee stayed home with Mom and Dad. She told me this story about her day, so I'm going to relay it in her own words.

"Hey Steve, you'll never guess what happened to me today. I was outside, taking care of some business and when your mom let me back inside, there was an intruder in the house! It was standing over by that one bed next to the DVD cabinet. As soon as I saw it, I puffed up my fur on my back. That really must have scared it because it didn't move a muscle! Just for good measure, I decided to bark at it and tell it to get out of the house. You know me, I don't really ever bark, but I can't allow intruders in the house when you and Kat are away! The funny thing is, your mom and dad didn't seem to be alarmed by the intruder. In fact, your mom got out the camera and started filming me. She was even kind of taunting me and recruited your dad to help. Here, I confiscated the video for evidence.


Even though she stopped videoing, I didn't let my guard down and kept barking and telling the intruder to go away for at least another five minutes. Your mom must have decided that the intruder was hungry, because she put some treats on the floor all around it. Well, I told the intruder not to eat the treats. Then, very carefully, I crept up on it and ate the treats. I had it so afraid that it didn't even try to stop me! After that, I decided it wasn't a threat to my safety and gave it a good sniffing. I think I must have gotten rid of it because I went outside again later and when I came back inside it was gone." Wow, Ulee is some dog. She guarded our house very well against the Bissel that was trying to steal all of our fur. I am really glad that she didn't let it eat any of the treats either. Aren't you pups proud of Ulee too?

Steve

Cleaning? Is she crazy?

Mom is getting really tired, but if we can’t go to sleep, neither can she. She’s started cleaning the house to stay awake. We can’t believe it. If any day was a good day to get a free pass on cleaning, a normal person would say that Blogathon day was that day. Apparently Mom is not normal.

Once the vacuum came out, we got annoyed and went to hide on the bed with Dad. (Mom’s covering her face with her hands because I’m posting a picture of the bed not made for the whole internet world to see.) We don’t have a Dyson, but we have a Hoover and it’s annoying. From what I hear about the Dyson, it must be like a zillion times worse, so I hope one never shows up at our house.

Steve